Monday, April 19, 2010

Behavior Issues

A few months ago, William's school trapped me (through smiles and flattery) into volunteering to keep track of all of the tardy, correction, and behavior slips in the middle and upper school. They said they needed someone reliable and trust-worthy; what could I do in the face of such warm praise? They needed someone who wouldn't reveal the deep, dark disciplinary secrets at Liberty. But I can trust you, right? Besides, all of the names have been changed to protect the innocent. Or, even the not-so-innocent in this case.

This is not a difficult job, but, as I have discovered, is incredibly tedious. It was made even more difficult by the school secretary accidentally erasing many hours of work in one well-intentioned flash drive clean-up.

It is occasionally amusing, though, particularly in the "Behavior" category. This category is saved for the especially terrible crimes, crimes which go beyond tardiness or violations of the uniform code. Things like "talking in class after many warnings" and "running in hall." The really funny ones, though, are the ones where individual personalities really shine through. Ones like, "rollerblading in class" or "put snow in T--'s hood." How about "whistling in class and loud crying when told to stop?" Or the cryptic "water bottle, repeated warnings?" Hmmm.

I find myself wondering about the thought processes of these criminals. What made him or her think that rollerblading in class or melodramatic crying was worth getting into trouble?

Did it seem cool at the moment?

Did he consider backing down but was too far in and his pride held him to that particular course?

Did he need a spectacular event to attract the attention of someone - a particular someone?

And, in the end, was it worth the laughs? Was there any regret? Any reconsideration of that chosen course?

These are mysteries which would stump even the experts on "Criminal Minds," for who can understand the mind of a teenager?

All those hormones running around? *shudder*

I realize that I once was one of those creatures but have worked long and hard to push all of those cringe-worthy memories into the obliterating mists of time. I can't revisit those days!

The certainties! The uncertainties! The hormones!

What is even more alarming is the thought that within a relatively short period of time, John and I will be expected to try and parent such a creature!

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